Emotional Constipation

According to the computer man, the computer's so badly crashed that even the keyboard blew! Apparently a HUGE power surge went through mycomputer, so much so that he asked whether my house had been recently struck by lightning. Hence, here I am all the way in Outram using my mum's rather prehistoric computer with super sucky internet connections to catch up with me emails and what not. I reckon I'll have to stay with her in the office till late as she stays to finish her work.. Hello KFC delivery.

I've been feeling rather neglected off late, emotionally drained from my attempts to understand all the chaotic, semi-dissolved relationships around me. Plus the fact that my mum's been swarmed with work ever since the end of last year( makes me hate law even more) and leaving her no choice but to abandon her darling daughter home alone most days of the week. The crashing of the Computer doesn't help one bit, it removed the other form of human interaction I thrived on - emails and MSN. Thank foodness the phone lines weren't cut off too, I reckon I'd hjave probably started talking to the cat downstairs out of desperation. It has suddenly dawned upon me how reliant I am on the Internet with regards to my social well-being. My monologues on the blog give me a sense that someone's listening even if there isn't. I don't care how disillusioned I am as long as I'm comforted and not end up talking to Mr Kitty Cat downstairs. And my frequent emails to my sister across the globe are things which I truly look forward to each week, the highlights of my day, really miss her. =(

Which comes to my next train of thought of furthering my education. To my misfortune, the one course that I am keen to take (Special Education) is non-existant in Singapore unless you're looking at a miserable diploma from NYP. Do I have the financial and mental capability to spend few years in another country? My sister has been gone for a mere few months and already I'm terrified of some of the experiences she goes through. It's a saddening thought, being in a foreign land without your friends and family.